I'm glad to go, I cannot tell a lie

I'm getting ready to leave DC, my home for the past seven years. It still hasn't quite sunk in- that I'm saying goodbye to clumsily galloping to catch trains covered with ads for jets and buses covered with ads for abortion counseling; to throngs of overachieving high school students and Girl Scouts and gastrointerologists descending on the city every summer; to chance meetings with former teachers, friends' parents, and neighbors who sit outside to smoke and call me "doll"; to being kept awake by the sound of young women on the sidewalk below yelling "Get out of my FACE!" to each other; to frequent conversations in which you mask your insecurity or dissatisfaction with your job by bemoaning with studied weariness that you are sooooo busy and you are soooo annoyed with (insert government agency here). In a way it seems like I've only lived here for three years-the part of the city where I went to college, which is now just the closet Metro stop to the Trader Joe's, seemed at the time like the boundaries of the civilized world; and it shocks me to think how little of the city I'd actually seen before I graduated. Sometimes I feel like I'm leaving just as everyone else is getting here, sometimes it seems like I'm just beating the rush. Either way, I think I'm leaving on a high note.

Surprisingly rhythmic Minnesotans

I think this video is going to inspire some shabby imitations at a wedding near you.

Celebrating average

A lot of people think the lives of either themselves or their one friend who's so crazy could make an entertaining television show. There have been times in my life where I've felt like I stumbled into a bit part on one- both of the Aaron Sorkin (I really did trot behind my boss carrying lots of papers and being mildly insubordinate) and Aaron Spelling variety (Girl in Library #3). But if there was a show about my life, it would be sponsored by Fage Yogurt and Netflix. And you know what? I revel in it. These people do too. Here's a representative entry:

Today, while walking to the car, I was disappointed when one of my friends called shotgun before me. The disappointment quickly subsided when I realized that it was my car and I was driving. MLIA

My Life is Average

Fordlandia

With all the moaning and groaning about the Big Three's failure to innovate, it's easy to forget that attempts to innovate can go horribly, horribly awry. Case in point: Henry Ford's attempt to lock in a solid supply of rubber by setting up a model community and rubber plantation in the Brazilian jungle. What could go wrong, right? In a post about Fordlandia: The Rise and Fall of Henry Ford’s Forgotten Jungle City by Greg Grandin, Mental Floss gives a few examples:

'Ford was legendarily contemptuous of experts, but he could have saved some serious dough if he’d just hired a consultant to tell him that the plantation wasn’t at all suitable for growing rubber....Fordlandia’s trees were no exception, and caterpillars and blight quickly decimated the fields."

and

"...while the indigenous workers weren’t crazy about having to eat American foods, they were livid about having to eat in a cafeteria setting rather than enjoying the homestyle meals to which they were accustomed. Eventually, the workers decided they’d had enough of the affront of cafeteria dining and rioted during a meal."

and the kicker:

"...Ford was that he disliked accountants so fiercely that he never had his company audited. By the end of his tenure, the Ford Motor Company allegedly had no idea exactly how much it cost to build a car."

Mental Floss: Fordlandia: Henry Ford’s Ill-Fated Foray Into the Brazilian Jungle

Preach it

"If it’s the most beautiful day in the world outside, I’d still stay inside until 2:30 p.m. Because it’s just as nice inside as it is outside. I love outside, but inside is nice. People think I should feel guilty. They say, “You should go out and do this.” I’m like, “No, it’s nice inside.”"

NYTimes: Sunday Routine-David Chang

How is it possible?!!?

The blue and the green are the SAME COLOR!

Discover: The Blue and the Green

James Franco's Rejected UCLA Commencement Speech

My college graduation speakers were George H.W. and Barbara Bush, who were more kid/grandparent friendly than this alleged attempt by James Franco, but not nearly as entertaining. And he's right about the jet pack.

James Franco's Rejected UCLA Commencement Speech via the Steel Closet

Advice to the President

In addition to suggesting that Obama win the everlasting loyalty of Medvedev's staff by asking for cigarette breaks during long meetings comes this tidbit from the Moscow Times:

"You could also visit the Gazprom PR department, not to discuss gas disputes with Ukraine but to seek an explanation of how the company came up with the name Nigaz for a new Russian-Nigerian joint venture. We hear that Gazprom spokesman Sergei Kupriyanov is especially good at the correct pronunciation of the word."

Moscow Times: An Insider’s Guide to Moscow for Mr. Obama

Burrrrnnnn

A few days ago I went to the library to pick up my reserved copy of Martin Gilbert's "A History of the Twentieth Century" (vol.2). The man behind the counter asked if it was for school or for fun. "Fun, I guess." I answered. He grimaced and said "That's a shame." Called a nerd by a librarian! Sobering.

Depressing July 4th reading...

but very interesting. I'd be crazy to try and pick out excerpts, just read the whole thing.

New York Review of Books: Holocaust: The Ignored Reality

via NYT Ideas Blog

Way down in Kosovooooooooo

My company does a lot of projects in some of the places mentioned in this song, but I'm afraid if I send the video to my coworkers I'll be committing some kind of sexual harassment.